Nothing has changed apart from everything

Long time no blogsies. I can't say i've been busy, unless busy slacking counts. Yes, fallen into my old school habits. What would have made this year any different after all? Ironically, this week ze Copsonator is back to teach me english literature for the last time, feels like he shouldn't have left. But now that he has, I appreciate him.

What else...Oh!! I learnt to ride a bike, also. That's another vital skill i now know thanks to England.

I need to go back home soon. It's just not the same.
I don't think I can handle another Christmas here. Romania visit time, I think.
This is just getting rainier and colder. I don't like it.

The Result

Simply, I am pleased with my results. I passed with flying colours. And sure had I revised and had I respected deadlines at least once, the flying colours would have been higher and more colourful. But nonetheless impressive results because of that.

Results day wasn't as dawning as I thought. Admittedly as I got my results handed to me I didn't breathe until I got out of reach of other people, in order to look at them. Naturally the second task was to calculate what profit I had made from my results (from the contract with mum). =)

Simply: the result is me being terrified of next year's subjects. Sink or swim for real now.
Don't be afraid of it, embrace it. IT being 5 A levels + 1 NVQ and job.
Goodbye social life, hello screaming, stressed out foreigner. -waves-

Long Story Short..

Baaaaaaasically..

Been to Spain, witnessed crime, came home.
Went to christian camp, became a christian, came home.
Read a few books, but cannot honestly be bothered to still list them as I go.
Am now looking for a second job; hopefully tomorrow shall tell.
Good, now I'm up to date with the online world. =)

I'm happy too. Which is refreshing. And pie helps.

I still love you, but in a different way, in some ways, even more than before.

Annoying España Or Something Like That...

I swear alcohol here is stronger than anywhere else.

Not that I´ve been drinking it, since that would be way illegal and uncool. LOL

I´m annoyed because it´s karaoke night tonight. Normally that would not be an issue at all, to the contrary even. But tonight, this old papa keeps singing...he´s on his 4th song as we speak, yep. No fair, I say. Discrimination.

Give me one more beer, and I´ll rugby tackle my rights to sing badly in front of a crowd.

Is there a romanian version of Hakuna Matata? Bring it!

So... Bulls!

Went shopping today- only one activity amongst many others including: sleeping, reading, burning in the sun, and checking out the bartenders.



Also, I think I like this place, not sure why. It´s cheap. And there are a LOT of dubious characters around, but still. Those that carry goats, and bulls, what´s really the difference, eh?

Not sure I will be able to comment as often, but what I will say is, I already have m Dragon item which is of course, the highlight o my holiday.



Cliff is supposed to join us on Thursday, but we just bought a map for Barcelona, and don´t know where the hotel is, so that should be rivetting. We´re leaving this shiny resort full of cheap`nothings! -does sad face- =(



I don´t miss you.



=)



AAAAANY of you. Spain´s hot.



P.S Maybe those icecreams at breakfast, lunch, and dinner, didn´t help my "diet".

I lovez this place. I do I do.

Words VII

9. He´s Just Not That Into You by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo.

Will check spellings later on names, since this is timed internet and not free! =O

All I can say is LOLZERS. Really. Great swimming pool and beach companion. Made me chuckle.

P.S He´s just not that into you, babes.

Goats!

Been here for more or less 3 days now, but we´re still so white that we´re slightly racist to the locals, and not yet know our way around too well. With that said, we´ve discovered the town centre today; my feet hurt. Typical pretty, pictoresque streets with so many shops that even if we had the money, we wouldn´t have the time. Also, men with goats. Honest. Bearded short man, obviously spanish, carrying goat.

Everything is very dreamy over here, as i pondered laying on the beach with my sunglasses and hat covering my face. I daydreamed for a while, attempting to tan, and when i opened my eyes, everything was a haze. You know, how your dreams sometimes are, mostly on tv, slightly foggy, but in a dreamy way, which makes everything look better, yes? Indeed it does. But then i realised that in fact, my glasses were blurry. I wiped them and first noticed the sand, pretty and...sandy. Then further down towards the water, the all typical fat man washing himself. Or whatever those guys do. Risking a harsh stereotypes, but there is always that fat guy, with the huuuuuuuge beer belly that just hangs around at the water- doesn´t swim, doesn´t sunbathe, just sort of stands there, and stares at you. I did kep contact for a while, but then he became rather hot. And then i wiped my glasses and just closed my eyes for less dramatic effect! Phew close one! =O

Benefits of the hotel- the one that hasn´t kicked us out yet- are that we get this hand tag/bracelet thing that entitles you to free drinks and snacks. I just thought i was one of the chosen ones, really, in my humble opinion.

The food has eyes, and is crunchy, just how i like it! =P So that is not a problem.

Also, had a weird dream last night. A horror movie about Michael Jackson. Very odd.
I should probably get new sunglasses, these are messing with my eyes and are probably haunted..

Because this hotel is so majestic.. we get free entertainment, which is up for debate. I mean we do have a huge group of chavs staying here, which in their own right are an ongoing 24/7 show. But last night was karaoke, and boy you haven´t seen karaoke until you hear Hakuna Matata in german, sung by twins. Now THAT is quality entertainment, my friends. For free. -jumps of joy- =)

P.S We also found the beach yesterday, which was quite useful.

"E acolo unde-o vad!" LOL or in english: "It´s there where I see it!" -genius, really.

Spain - Gaining Entrance

Arived in Spain, and as expected already it has not gone to plan!

Flight was fine, just as we arrived at the hotel, they said our reservation was not recognized and sent us to a different hotel... -rolling eyes-

Oh and because of that mishap, we missed dinner trying to find a different hotel to stay at, so I have good reason for being on my second beer! =)

Too dark and probably too tipsy to find beach yet, but i´m sure they´ll feed us tomorrow. They´d better.
Oh and mum is more than slightly drunk (but she says TIPSY). And she just slapped me.

Laterz!

Happy Days

Lots and lots happening today, but let's not forget ze priorities! =P Today is my dear dear cousin's 19th birthday!
Finished exams, gotten over that oh so spicy 18th year, and here you are, as gorgeous as ever and ready for another kick ass year, yes? All the best m'dear, and will hopeeeeeeefully see you very shortly.

Happy la multi ani to you =)

Lotsa kissez

And lovez!

XXXXXX because you be ze awesomeness =D

Lucky 7th

7 months of you on the 7th of the 7th. We both forgot, but celebrated anyways :)
Truth is, we don't need an anniversary to celebrate. 7 months...that shows amazing patience...and awesomeness teamwork, hehe. =) It's not me and you, it's just us.

Oh and I hate you, because I will miss you, and I love you.

And for ze extra cheddar : I lovez you way lotz piezers.

=)

Please Don't...

I'm so overcome with emotion at the moment that I feel frozen despite the 25 degree C weather.
Please just don't...
God, just...it can't happen again. And I'm already mad at you.
I can't even think straight. But I have to blink away my emotions, because she needs me strong.
She needs me to not break down, just in case she does.

Please... don't.
It can't be happening, it can't, it can't!

Words VI

8. Can You Keep A Secret by Sophie Kinsella.

Cute book. Apart from using the word "agog" 6 times. That drove me insane and after reading the word a 5th time, I threw the book across the room. Find a different word, jeepers! Otherwise, I need my good chicklit from time to time. Cute stuff. Wouldn't probably read it in public, though. Light read, took roughly 5 hours.

Which Reminds Me..

Ooooh by the way! Finished exams.
Could've gone better, had I payed attention for the past 2 years, but oh well.
If I fail, at least I know I deserved it. That's all there is to it.

Words V

7. Tell No One by Harlan Coben.

"The mythical beast, I thought. You don't chop off its head. You stab it in the heart." pg 344, 2 thirds down. it

Elle Oh Vee Ee it. But then I've always been a sucker for a good thriller with short chapters. =P

Words IV

6. The Murder Game by Beverly Barton.

Dandy, just dandy! Endlessly amusing.

Rabbit Heart

This is a gift it comes with a price
Who is the lamb and who is the knife?
Midas is king and he holds me so tight
And turns me to gold in the sunlight

By Florence And The Machine

Words III

5. Breaking Dawn by Stephenie Meyer.

I loved the whole saga, which made me feel from impossible anger very close to rainbowy heartwarming bullcrap, through the whole frustration and exasperation of the whole romantic thing. Overall, i laughed a lot. I enjoyed it, which is what it's about. Great stuff haha. =)

What Do You Need To Be Happy?

You Need Power to Be Happy

You are an influential, brilliant person. You are often the most competent person in the room. Being in charge is very important to you. You get irritated when you have to depend on someone else. You feel great when you are leading a group and inspiring other people. It's your gift. Nothing makes you feel worse than being powerless. You need to be in control of your life.

What Do You Need to Be Happy?

Well, can you get any more vague, please?
If it was that easy, everybody would be happy..provided they take this quiz, of course. =)

Teenager

You know you're a teenager when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend making out.
You also realise how unsly it actually was when his parents can tell what the events were - because the glitter off of your shirt is everywhere on him. =)

Oops!

Good times. -giggles-

People Countdown

I am now very close to finishing with school uniforms and compulsory education, as they call it.
This got me thinking about how out of my friends, some will stay for another 2 years of fun school, and some will go wherever they may.
Now realistically, i believe out of the roughly 20 people i enjoy the company of every day into and out of that hellhole, maybe 2 i will have as friends for more than 10 years after next week when our last compulsory day of hanging out in the same place is. Then i went to a bigger scale, including everyone i know in that Devil's Den, and figured that i will only probably keep in close contact with another 2, maybe 3 others.

Now that approximate number of 5 are actually people who have constantly been there, no matter what year group, what classes we had, how busy we were, what country we lived in, and whatever else was going on, it didn't matter.
Out of those 5 that i wish to have as friends for more than 10 year after next Monday, i believe one will be my friend for at least 50 or more years, depending on when we die. I just wish that i had more time. More time to make those strong bonds with at least those 5, but maybe I'm wrong. And in 20 years time i will blog on here, writing about how amazed and shocked i am to still have those 20 sweet people around me.

I guess it's just a human cycle, that in 2 decades there will be other people to leave behind, other people to attempt to keep in touch with.

I'll tell you this though, I've tried the whole keeping in touch thing. Moving country does that to ya.
From now on, dear friends, if you need me, want to talk to me, please, be my guest. But see, it saves me those sad memories after we lose that loose touch if i don't try to keep to it in the first place.

Selfish, yes. Logical, yes.

Think about it, what's ruder, initiating that contact and then giving up? Or not initiating it at all?

Hmm.

***** Correction: 2 people, not one, i hope will be close by for at least 5 decades more.

The Youth

Lock the parents out, cut a rug, twist and shout
Wave your hands
Make it rain
For stars will rise again
The youth is starting to change
Are you starting to change?
Are you?
Together

by MGMT

What Punctuation Mark Are You?

You Are An Exclamation Point

You are a bundle of... well, something. You're often a bundle of joy, passion, or drama. You're loud, brash, and outgoing. If you think it, you say it. Definitely not the quiet type, you really don't keep a lot to yourself. You're lively and inspiring. People love to be around your energy. (But they do secretly worry that you'll spill their secrets without even realizing it.) You excel in: Public speaking You get along best with: the Dash

What Punctuation Mark Are You?

Words II

2 more books down.

3. New Moon by Stephenie Meyer.
4. Eclipse by Stephenie Meyer.

Paintballing

Friendship is very much a love-hate thing. On one side i love having the people i most care about near me at the same time, and on the other hand i also love shooting at them with paintballs. Maybe that's just me.

A fabtastic day from start till finish, including rides home, evening, up to this point right now, yep, still awesomeness. I can't explain it very well, but there's something in the certain combination of paintball, fudge, chocolate, friends, Pie, Britain's Got Talent, Monopoly and MGMT's Oracular Spectacular....that just makes me happy to the core! =)

Ironic thing is that i had planned half of those things, knowing that they would make me feel what i'm feeling at this point, one quarter was planned by loved ones knowing it would make me happy, and the rest was pure good luck. I guess, i could always set myself up to be happy, but it takes just a little more to get to this stage right here.

Oh this is odd, i'm in one of those good moods that makes me nice.. and friendly.. even.. oh no wait for it! Cuddly! -gasp- =O

And i wouldn't change a thing. Nope. Nothing at all.
Thank you all. And you, luck, thank you too.

Now i have to go, Electric Feel is on.
Get away before i start dancing.

Happiness - Tick!

Happy Birthday Ruru =)

On the long list of things i want to do, one was to have a Christmas with my whole family, but i guess a birthday is just as well =D To be fair, it wasn't the whole family, because they would not fit in one house, but it was my parents, and both british and romanian grandparents. I'm fine with that =)

I can't stop smiling. 16 eh. Have come a long way from that first birthday in England, at 13, that felt more like a holiday than a birthday at home. Here I am, a happy romanian bunny in Britain. No complaints.

I feel sick from the amount of chocolate that was so huge, that i think i will have the taste of chocolate in my mouth for quite a while. No complaints there either. Got braces tightened yesterday, and they should be hurting like a stabbed bitch, but they don't, the wide smile on my face helps, i guess =)

I have to go now, being called on by my multi-national family to go and spend the day with them.
Ha. Who would've thought. Even better than chocolate, really.

I'll stop before i change my mind on that.

Promise

So I don't talk about my love life lots. Barely, if ever. This however doesn't mean that it isn't a huge part of my thoughts everyday, aside from the insane fantasies and cravings for different foods(which usually happen in english and maths lessons funnily enough).

I broke up with Pie. Then saw massive black holes in my decission and went back on my words only 2 days afterwards - today. Actually, the huge entities of no sense in the break up plan were obvious from the moment i spoke the words "i want to break up", the only thing that changed was my willingness to face them or to look away from my -obviously- insane argument. And yes yes i hear "i told you so" from most, including myself.

But what's done is done, and i don't regret it, because now my head is clear.
I might even try and love you too. No promises.

I want to..

Now that I'm back on track with ze blog.. I can continue in my usual rambles.
As i was philosophizing about happiness, i discovered something unpleasant. It really doesn't matter what or who makes you happy. It's who you would want to make you happy. Goes hand in hand with love. Doesn't matter who you love or who loves you, it's who you want to love and who you want to love you.
Damnit. Ya know God? You could have made this so much easier...oh but no. You went on and made me think crazy thoughts. Thanks..

Update

Went to Scotland last week. And yes...a bit late on the updates. Edinburgh was amazing. Nothing near to Paris, but still awesomeness. I'm not gonna promise to post the pictures on here at some point.. because i'm pretty sure i did that with Paris and it never happened. It was a happy week. And that's all that matters, with pictures or not.

Words

2 books down, 98 to go =)

1. 11 Minutes by Paulo Coelho.
2. Twilight by Stephenie Meyer.

L Word

Love has been on my mind lately. The more I think of it, the more it frustrates me how unable of understanding it I am. Once I am angry enough with myself, I seem to come up with an idea, a definition which after about 1 minute I dismiss and shake my head at my own stupidity.

Can anyone tell you a concrete definition? Or even better they say "everyone has their own meaning of love". But really, is that the best we, as humans, can do? Their own meaning of love..what a joke. BS. Maybe our human egos are just too fat to accept that love, despite whichever experiments, research, debates and experience we have been through, cannot be explained. Too damn right that it's beyond me. And I stopped digging through my brain for an answer.
Hell, maybe one day, I'll know. Maybe even follow one of the criteria of "happily ever after" , you never know.

"I love you" - what the hell does that mean?! Enlighten me..

Snow..?

It snowed today. Yes, in England. Surely there is something dubious going on with the universe.
It was a perfect day. Spent with friends and Pie.
If there is a God up there, i thank you.
We needed this.
Oh and i'm happy. =)

What Kind Of Thinker Are You?

Your Thinking is Abstract and Sequential

You like to do research and collect lots of information. The more facts you have, the easier it is for you to learn. You need to figure things out for yourself and consider all possibilities. You tend to become an expert in the subjects that you study. It's difficult for you to work with people who know less than you do. You aren't a very patient teacher, and you don't like convincing people that you're right.

What Kind of Thinker Are You?

You Know You're a Teenager When...

You know you're a teenager when your mother speaks of the music you listen to as "noise".
"I don't know how you can concentrate with that noise going on" - that was just precious! =)

Moronic BS

It's that wonderful time of year when british kids my age get to apply to post 16 education, and since i am in this country, i might as well abide by the rules and regulations.
I know where i want to go, what i want to do, and i believe i am in control - for now. And yet i find myself feeling something that i don't understand. It's nearly...fear.
I have come to fear my own feelings, how pathetic.

Coma Leopold

(Leopold has been in a coma for a while, and has just woken up after replacing his blood. ( had to reinstall windows)

I don't understand people. I honestly don't, and I'm trying so hard. Is it human nature to wallow in self pity? Fascinating. X_X
My confusion and frustration may translate as indifference, when in fact, it's pretty much the opposite. It would sadden me if that is how it is interpreted. I should make a dictionary... translating from me to everyone else, and from everyone else to me.

I only have a tiny "care circle" so anyone outside that can go swim with flying pigs for all i care. In fact, towards anyone else i am indifferent.
There's no grey, you either care, or you don't. Matters, or it doesn't.

I think I've added someone to my care circle unconsciously. And I'm scared of that, because i don't know how or when it happened, i just care. Are my filters getting weak? I hope i still have safety filters towards who i care about, because viruses are not welcome in that department, it would be disastrous. Scary thought.

Intro

The phone ringing woke me up this morning at 8am, which is just cruel on the 1st of January. Swore at the person that disturbed my peace, replied to the insanely early text, then went back to sleep. I got another hour or so of sweet sleep then got called out to go to work. Ah well, that's life.

It's probably how this whole year will be, a lot of hard work, achievements earned independently, but prompted by team work.
I don't even want to start thinking of it...And it's already here! Please rewind and give me august...

I dropped 3 sandwiches today. And i kicked a kid again. Oh the wonders of waitressing... =) Never gets dull.

I Will..

I will get all As.
I will read 100+books.
I will see MT in a swimsuit. LOL.

Happy New Year... =)